It's Her Birth Day

This weekend is Adam’s birthday. The hubs will be turning 30++++. Have I mentioned lately how much I love this man? Well, if I haven’t, it’s a lot. So of course, I would love his birthday. I think a guy that’s as good as him deserves a day. A day that’s for celebrating him.

But you know what? His birthday is more than that.

I’ve now been with him for more than a decade of birthdays. And after we had Barrett I realized… his birthday was more than just a day to celebrate him. His birthday, is also his mother’s birth day.

I’ve mentioned it before, but I don’t know that I’d ever really given credit to that before becoming a mother. Just how important the actual birth day is. The annual celebrations of life that are birthdays always seemed like grand occasions, but I don’t think I fully valued just how much of a gift a birth day is. I didn’t really ever pair the miracle of the start of life with the opening of presents, eating cake, and blowing out the candles that comes each year after, if we’re lucky. I didn’t ever really consider how my mother felt on my birth day. Or what his day meant to his mother. And how she must feel, every year, on September 28th, as she recalls the first day she laid eyes on him.

Mother-in-laws can get a bad rap. Less than father-in-laws, I think. Father-in-law, not a polarizing term. But mother-in-law? That carries quite the stigma I think. And the relationship between a daughter-in-law and a mother-in-law can sometimes be an interesting one. Even the word, mother-in-law just sounds so cold, doesn’t it? And emotionless, in a sense. And I am hypersensitive to that fact now. Having three children, there is a chance that someday, I may get to be a mother-in-law. Which makes me very thankful for mine. And I am so thankful to my mother-in-law for giving my husband his birth day. And for letting me share them with him. Because I do think there can exist, a very special bond between a mother and her sons. And even moreso when this son is the very youngest of the bunch.

She and my father-in-law didn’t know who I was when she they were raising their children but I love them for raising this fascinating man to be just right for me. Without even knowing it.

Having our own children, we find ourselves constantly thankful that our parents never left us, and always loved us. Because, it turns out, parenting is an every day, way of life. Not just a job. 

I am thankful to my mother-in-law for raising her boys into men who know what it takes to be incredible husbands. Are sensational fathers. And who adore their wives. 

I love her for teaching her children what it means to nurture. Both relationships and people. 

I am so thankful that she taught the son that I share with her how to share his feelings. And to her, for modeling empathy. And tenderness. Boy, do I feel lucky for that.

I am so thankful to her for continuing to stay involved in our lives even in times where I think it could be hard. As the mother-in-law. As she weathered the transitions from our dating life to married life. 

How incredible a gift that she taught her children to be confident. And that they are fully capable to reach their goals. Whatever they may be.

What a wonderful gift it is for our children to have such insanely wonderful grandparents. Who love them effortlessly and completely.

I adore her for showing him the importance of quality time spent with family and the people that matter. And that, at the end of the day, family is there for you, no matter what the day has brought you. 

I so appreciate the example of marriage that she provides. Which serves as a message to us that we can weather any storm, together. 

I am thankful that as I’ve matured, I can see that she is happy her son chose me. Because I think that can be hard to see when you’re 19.  

I love that she listens to my thoughts on being a mother and a wife. And tells me it’s okay to have bad days. Because when I look back, I won’t regret any of it. 

I love this woman the most for loving her son {and all her children}. And for, with her husband, growing the man that I am lucky enough to call my husband. But who I understand more now, than ever, will always and forever be, her baby. 

So to my hubs, a very happy birthday weekend to you. And to my mother-in-law… For the first time in forever, I want to wish you a happy happy anniversary of a birth day. I only hope that we can help our little loves to be the type of people that our parents were able to send out into the world. Ones who still love their mamas. And are great human beings. And who are so thankful, for birthdays.