Oh hey there mama of a newborn. I know you forgot this. In the middle of the night. When you were walking through the dark to retrieve a crying babe. A babe that needed the breast or the bottle. A babe that you snuggled close to you and nourished in some way until they were once again content and ready for a bit more slumber. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama of a toddler. I know you forgot this. When you were in the midst of hostage negotiations. Battling over whether she got in her car seat “my byself” or with your assistance. As you taught her independence and patience. But you were feeling the heat in your face as you started to lose your cool. And you finally just scooped her up and placed her in her seat. Feeling like you lost your patience. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama of two who is staying home. I know you forgot for a second. When you looked around the house and saw a rainbow of toys covering every other inch of your world. When you took time while they were running around at the park to hop on your Facebook. When you made the decision to rest during nap time instead of tackling the never ending laundry. And you felt guilty for the fifth time that day. I know you forgot.
Oh hey there mama of a nine year old. I know you forgot this. When you were reminding him “TONE” and “RESPECT” as he tested out the art of pushing buttons. And those buttons are most often yours. And you attempt daily to remember consistency and grace. But then, on occasion, you retorted, “RUDE!” because, well, he was rude. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama who works nights. I know you forgot for a moment. When you were getting dressed for work as many people sit down for dinner. And you drank your coffee at 1 am. When you drove home as the sun was coming up and you walked in the door and wanted to fall into bed but instead, got the plates out for breakfast and checked the laundry. And kissed your kids hello. I know you forgot.
Oh hey there mama battling infertility. I know you forgot for a moment. As you cried over another negative test. As you prepped for another round of shots. As you looked at your child and still longed for one more. And felt guilty for ever seeming ungrateful. And for wanting more. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama of a tween. I know you forgot for a moment. As you took a stand about her outfit. And told her she was too young for makeup. As you felt like you were living on two different planets. And questioned how you would ever get through all of high school with her hormones. And all you really wanted deep inside was for her to say, “thanks, mom…” I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama on her own. I know you forgot for a moment. When you were watching the husband and wife buying groceries at the store and you lost your shit with your two in tow. When you woke in the middle of the night to chase the monsters realizing it’s your turn again because it’s always your turn. When you questioned if things would have been better if you’d just stayed together. “For the kids.” I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama who has a career. I know you forgot for a moment. As you looked at your calendar for the day one last time before you walked out for your commute. As you enjoyed your quiet time in the car because it is YOUR time. But you felt guilty for that. As you remembered at noon that you have to run to the store and turn in that permission slip. And you wonder how you’ll get a balance someday. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama who is sick. I know you forgot for a moment. As you said no again to outside commitments. As you told your child, “I can’t.” As you attempted to schedule appointments and pick up prescriptions and figure out how the bills were going to pay themselves. As you wanted, more than anything, to just be normal. And you felt guilty for not being more thankful for all the ways your life is full. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama of a teenager. The kid who is learning how to drive and be a person. The one who has opinions that you sometimes wonder where they got them from. The one who you internally and externally struggle with every day, “am I doing it right?!” The kid who you have loved to watch grow but want time to slow down for. I know you forgot for a second.
Oh hey there mama of growns. I know you forgot for a moment. When you wonder if you did it all. Enjoyed it all. As you think, “if I could just go back I’d…” I know you forgot for so many moments.
…
Mama. You forgot. You questioned. You paused and wondered. You have asked yourself over and over again. But guess what? The fact that you forgot is not because you are doing it all wrong. Or because you are not good at this motherhood gig. You forgot over and over. And you felt guilty. And have wondered if you are the mama your babes need. You have wondered where the manual is to get every moment right. All because YOU are exactly what your babes need. You are the one they GET to have. YOU, mama, are a damn good mama.
And I know you forgot. And you will always have moments… days… weeks… phases…
But girl, you are getting it right. YOU are a DAMN good mama.
