Hey hey, it’s Monday! Last night was a pretty big deal, so the world around me tells me. I really do not know a thing about football. I never have. In a past life, I did sport a cheerleading uniform on the sidelines, but it should be noted that, at that time, I also believed that the whole 4 down thing was what each team had to get the ball from one end zone to the other. And I also requested cheers like first and ten when my team was on defense. Soooo, good thing I have three boys, right? The good news for them is that I love nachos and half-time shows so I’m always up for at least watching while folding laundry or keeping a baby out of the lazy susan.
Due to my lack of expertise, I do not have much to say about the football that was played last night except to say that I was thrilled my children had already been tucked into beddy bye when Mr. 51 started throwing punches. What a nice pairing with the domestic violence message, NFL. Grown men, people. And I must also state, being COMPLETELY out of the loop and having read only headline after headline about #deflategate {even though real news continued to happen} that I am also extremely confused about how a team that “allegedly” cheated by using flat balls is now the Supreme Owner of the Football Universe and gets to go to Disney World, but whatevs.
So instead, I wanna talk about the real stuff. The commercials. The entertainment. The weird flesh colored leather jacket that the sideline commentator was wearing…
The National Anthem…
I am lukewarm on Idina. It’s not about Frozen. Or my children’s continued obsession with all the music from the movie. Or the fact that Let It Go is performed on the reg, daily around our house. Still. No no. It’s about the fact that the very first time I ever heard/saw Miss Menzel, was in the movie Rent and she sang Over the Moon. Yes, I know. She also sings many other memorable songs in the movie but that one was just bizarre. Anyway, ever since then, I find her voice a little shrill {I’m pretty sure a red-haired girl just de-friended me}. So I didn’t have high hopes from the National Anthem but really, I thought it was superb. On key. Not too indulgent. And man, are her teeth white and straight. The only thing I didn’t like was that the coach with the hoodie didn’t seem to dig the whole hand over your heart thing. It’s a courtesy, dude. That was a little unfortunate. The singing though, that was on point. And how about John Legend’s little dimples singing right before her? That was darling. Oh, and cheers to Idina for not being called Adele Nazeem! You’ve finally made it!
The Commercials…
I have been watching Super Bowl commercials pretty closely for a good 10 years. As an Advertising Major {Shout out to the COJMC!} we were given the task to watch and dissect the spots. So, ya know, having no current industry experience, and not knowing at all what’s what in the TV Ad world, I pretty much fancy myself an aficionado. This year, if I had to theme the commercials… or at least the first three quarters of commercials before VS and 50 Shades came on the scene… I would have said I wasn’t watching commercials… I was getting a big hug. I mean, seriously. So much feel goodness and emotionally provoking material this year! I am glad I wasn’t PMSing or it could have been a real cryfest.
My Fave Touchy Feelies…
McDonalds – People were confused about this, apparently. I was not. Whether they are made of pink slime or not, my children love McDonald’s Chicken mcnuggets. They do. It’s a fact of life. So if my children are watching the Super Bowl with me {which they were}, and McDonald’s has a sweet message, well, that makes me feel okay when that is the one brand they immediately recognize. Which, of course, leaves them requesting chicken mcnuggets. And if I can pay for said Chicken McNuggets by telling someone I love them, that’s straight up cash money in my pocket. That might actually mean that the type of currency I get paid as a sahm could actually be worth something! Ba da ba ba ba… I’m lovin’ it, McDonald’s {and though many hate you, your Diet Coke continues to be the very best in history of mankind. Thank you for that.}
Always – I had seen this ad well before the Super Bowl but I LOVE Always for choosing to take it to such a huge platform. This is one I will go back and show my boys again in order to try to strike up a good convo. And since all of my 5 year olds besties are girls, I’m pretty sure he already thinks that throwing like a girl is pretty much boss. #LikeAGirl
Dove – This ad made me wish I had been watching with a room full of grown men. This would have allowed me to look around and see a room full of grown men pretending to have something in their eyes. #RealStrength
Best Buds – Yes. I would walk 500 miles, too. Puppies never lose. Never.
Coca Cola – Anytime we can have a conversation started about bullying, and being kind, I think it’s a good thing. Now I just wish that pouring Coca-Cola on people who are a holes would actually result in them being nicer humans. But that, well, that is highly improbable. Will I drink more Coke because of it? Probably not. Do I appreciate that Coca-Cola at least pretends to care… sure do.
All in all, the amount of touchy feelies has me wondering about what our current world needs more of. I mean, there was a whole lot of emotion for a man’s football final, right? And I think the answer to what the world needs more of is no longer, more cowbell. No, what the world needs now, people, is love sweet love.
My fave funnies…
Doritos – I thought this was smart and entertaining. And oh so true.
Nationwide – Matt Damon. That is all.
eSurance – I thought this was fantastic and it made me realize that in the first eSurance commercial, Lindsey Lohan was driving the mini van. Right? Oh, Lindsey.
BMW – What is the internet anyway? @@@@@
My least Fave…
Nationwide – Yeesh. I guess I said that I commended Coca-Cola for having a convo about an important topic but a kid dying of a horrible accident… that seemed ill-placed, IMO. I’m thrilled my 5 and 3 year old had no questions about the dead kid. Cripes. It did make me want to babyproof every inch of my house. So thanks, Nationwide, for putting another to-do on my list. You are so not on my side.
And, if you were watching in Omaha, let me just tell you, if you’re plumbing is hurtin’, though the ad said to, NEVER call Burton. I repeat… NEVER. I have a very long story that I will spare you. Just heed my advice.
The Half-Time Show…
As for the half-time show, I thought Katy Perry was magnificent. I expected some major skin and girl kissing from her, and was pleasantly surprised {gosh… I sound like a mother}. I know, haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate. But I honestly think she was legitimately singing. Did anyone else think so? And we were spared any wardrobe malfunctions! And she rode a giant animal. All that was A+ in this out of touch mama’s opinion. I also liked the little Lenny cameo. Though I could have used a little more of that.
I’m not gonna lie. I got a little confused during Teenage Dream and thought I’d suddenly flipped over to Yo Gabba Gabba with the dancing sharks and palm trees {and my husband told me his morning that I was not alone with that thought}. And then I thought no… not Yo Gabba Gabba Annette Funicello. Beach Party. Was that what they were going for? Maybe? And then there were her karate chop “huhs” with Missy Elliott which, admittedly were a little wild. I didn’t get it. I will also have to admit that I wasn’t aware Missy was still on the scene. Her, cranking out Flip it and Reverse it took me back to 2003 and I nearly bust out some award-winning choreography {Phi Mu/Beta forevs}. So I am thinking that either she has made some big hit that I am unaware of in the last year or hers was the lucky name out the hat for the random slot of the year.
Miss Katy finished out leaving every mama little kid wanting to ride on a star. Seriously… the boys were both mesmerized. And I really thought she nailed the Firework/floating star situation. How many of us could belt out an inspirational song while being flown through the air, on a star, with fireworks blowing all over the place? I mean, I suppose they never asked if I wanted to give it a whirl but I feel like the degree of difficulty on that is somewhere in the 13 range on a scale of 1-10. I loved her whole vibe.
Other final thoughts include these…
Thank you, TV people, for saving the 50 Shades of Grey commercial for the fourth quarter, after my oldest was already in bed, which spared me having to explain the RED ROOM to a very inquisitive child.
And of course, congrats to the Patriots and the dreamy Tom Brady {who I am fairly certain is a cyborg} on your victory. It’s crazy, you know, because according to Lion King, cheetahs never prosper… but I guess everything that is true in life did not come from Lion King. And to that incredibly talented ball-flattening locker room attendant, you must have mad Hulk Smash skills. And to the Seahawks, my five year old has one question: why did you throw it to the guy in the other uniform? That’s sad.
For what it’s worth, the men in my house were cheering for the Seahawks. And I was cheering for Katy Perry. I think I won. And with that, this may be the first and last time that I ever write about NFL Football. Ever. Go Football!